Today is our two year wedding anniversary! We got married on July 2nd, 2017 and had the most beautiful wedding day surrounded by our family and friends. July 2nd, 2017 embarked us on a journey we could have never expected. Year two is very different in comparison to year one, a lot has changed and a lot has also stayed the same. We’ve experienced some really high highs and some really low lows but we were lucky to experience them together, as a team. We thought it would be fun to answer some questions about our first two years of marriage, everything from pet peeves to favorite memory to our biggest challenges.
What has surprised you the most about marriage?
B. Not a lot.
C. A lot has surprised me about marriage because I didn’t really have a good marriage modeled for me growing up so I feel like I have nothing to base what a good marriage looks like off of. So every day is a surprise but that’s part of the fun!
What is your biggest pet peeve about your spouse?
B. She be messy n stuff.
C. These are so silly and minor but they drive me bananas: he forgets to flush sometimes, loogies, he does things that my dad does that drove me nuts like coughs and sneezes SO LOUD when it’s not necessary at all, and lastly, he always corrects my driving.
What has been the most challenging thing about marriage?
B. She be messy n stuff. And speaking her love language, words of affirmation.
C. Marriage is challenging regardless, but for us, we have been in constant transition since we got married. We have been married for two years and still haven’t found our rhythm because we moved, or one of us got a new job, or we got a dog, or we joined a new church, or we moved again, etc. So that’s been really hard because there are things we thought we would have figured out by now that we don’t because there has been zero consistency. It’s also been challenging learning how to love someone and be loved by someone who is the complete opposite of you. Brad and I operate so differently that we’re still learning how to love well especially in the midst of transition.
What is it really like being married to your spouse?
B. People would probably stop being our friends if they knew how weird we were, especially together. We randomly sing the National Anthem and Justin Beiber songs all the time or break out into weird dance moves. We just love to laugh 🙂
C. Being married to Brad, who is the complete opposite of me is honestly hilarious to an outsider looking in. It’s a lot of me wanting to hang out and do stuff and him wanting to stay home. But don’t get me wrong, we have a lot of fun. We laugh at the dumbest stuff and we are complete fools when we’re together. No one can make me laugh as much as Brad can. He is very neat and tidy. He likes things to be a certain way and hates when they aren’t (I am NOT this way at all.) He can stay up for days at a time, so we rarely go to bed together. It’s an interesting life being married to Brad.
How did you know they were “the one”?
B. People need to stop overcomplicating this question. 1. Decide when you’re ready for marriage (for me that was starting my career.) 2. Find someone who shares similar core values (For me that was someone who was a Christian and had a deep and meaningful relationship with Christ…not that Americanized version of Christianity you see in people’s IG bios.) 3. Make sure you are physically attracted (duh!) 4. Talk about the future and what that looks like (kids, family, etc.) 5. Pick a timeline, get engaged, get married, and work on it for the rest of your life. Romantic right?
C. We had been dating around a month or so and I already knew I really liked him. We had a day full of normal life things like his basketball team played in a tournament, then we went to his staff Christmas dinner, and then we went to play games at his sister’s house. I was driving home (on December 16th to be exact) talking to him on the phone, because we were still at that stage in our long-distance relationship where we talked on the phone all the time, and the thought came into my head that I want to do normal life things with him for the rest of my life. It wasn’t anything extravagant, it was the simple day-to-day life things for me that I didn’t want to have to do without him.
What was your favorite memory from this last year?
B. Getting our Winnie boy!
C. Obviously, I loved getting Winston and learning how to care for something together! I have also really enjoyed getting to pioneer something together. We launched Vibe students at Vibrant Church this year and it’s been so fun to build it from the ground up and dream it into existence together.
What are some of your favorite things/qualities of your spouse?
B. She is my biggest fan and she supports me even when I don’t feel like I’m doing well. She has a huge heart and a cute butt.
C. I could rally for Brad until the sun went down. There is so much that I admire about him but I’ll share a few. He goes all in with everything he does. He loves bigger than anyone I know but he’s selective with who he allows himself to care for that much which I think is wise but something I lack. He can always make me laugh even when I’m really upset. He cares about the little details. He is the hardest worker I’ve ever met. Last but not least, he got me a corgi!
What is your favorite thing to do together? For date nights? Etc?
B. Studio Movie Grill coconut shrimp and chicken! Dave and Busters! Cheesecake Factory!
C. We love to go to the movies, Dave and Busters, and bowling! We also go down on some Cheesecake Factory or Hibachi! We’re pretty simple, our favorite spot when we dated was Chilis.
What is your favorite thing about marriage?
B. Having someone to lean on in tough times. We have already gone through some tough situations and it was SO much better going through it with someone. So I’m very thankful for that.
C. My favorite thing about marriage is having a built-in best friend and partner for life. I never have to worry about having to go through difficulties or celebratory moments alone. And knowing that no matter what, we always have each other.
Photography by Mary Margaret Flaming